Last time I posted I discussed finding a job and having that job… and whatever else I said… lets be honest, I’m not going to reread what I said. I can’t believe any of you even read it a first time through.
So… I’m still on the job search. Here are a few things I’ve learned.
Pi R squared, but Pie are round… feel free to pass that along.
Anyway, one of the job postings I came across was for a mortician driver. This would definitely be a life-affirming job. I mean, if you’re having a really bad day, you just have to look at your clients and remember that things could be worse. Sure, the people you work with are dead beats, but hey… if you ever need to talk things out, they’re there to listen. Another positive thing would be the ability to use the carpool lane. I sort of wonder if I would need to supply my on means of transportation. Would they give me the job if I only had a motorcycle… and if so, would they supply the stretchy cords? I should probably call and ask about these questions. I’m pretty sure I’m not the right person for the job. Every time I’d go to pick up the body (I assume I’d be picking up the body… one of the job requirements was must be able to lift 150+ lbs (creepy)) anyway… every time I’d go to pick up the body, I’d tickle it, just to make sure people aren’t messing with me. Another one of my hinders is the fact that I’ve been watching a lot of zombie movies recently. A common theme in those is dead people… and if life is just one big horror film… I’m not gonna be one of the first to die.
I find that most jobs require previous experience… but most people who have prior experience with transporting dead bodies are in jail… so it’s a learn as you go type of thing. Anyway… that’s really as far as I’ve gotten with the job search… I’ll keep you posted.
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